Monday, August 13, 2012

Smile and Nod... It scares people

I was sharing an article with someone, let's call her Gemma, about how some Ohio and Florida public schools lock children in secluded rooms as punishment. I was appalled by the information. These kids are Pre-K through 3rd grade and some with disabilities.

Me: I can't believe these schools are allowed to lock these kids up in secluded rooms, as if in solitary.
Gemma: I'm sure the rooms are not locked.
Me: Even if the rooms are not locked! Some of these kids are Pre-K so about 5 years old.
Gemma: Well Pre-K kids are actually 4 years old.
Me: *Irritated at this point* So it's ok to leave 4 year old in a room by themselves? These are the same reasons CPS sometimes takes kids away from their parents because they were left unsupervised alone.
Gemma: I'm sure they were just trying to remove the kid out of "A Situation"

This kind of conversations are unacceptable. I don't know of any responsible parent who would be ok with their kids being sent to a closet, or a bathroom to sit there by themselves as punishment. The only stipulations  to these rooms are that teachers can't choke or suffocate students, the room must be approved  by a Fire Marshal and the light must be on. That's it!!!! Are they for real?!

This Gemma misses the whole point of the conversation and she's trying to correct me on what's the age of a Pre-K student. Seriously? I've met this type of people throughout my life and i still don't know how to deal with them. I find myself slowly losing interest in having any kind of conversation with them because it's usually always a negative experience for me.I'm scared to start a dialogue cause they always twist the facts. It's frustrating and i don't have the energy to waste on this type of arguments, so i nod and smile.

These are more than likely the same kind of individuals who no matter what kind of story you are trying to tell they always have a similar one with a better twist. The "One Up You" folks. You got into a car accident? Well i got into a car accident in my brand new car as i was driving out of the car dealership! What do you have to say about that? You just lost your uncle? My whole dad's side of the family died in a boating accident... they never found the bodies!!! You're sad? Just let it go there are plenty of people out there way worse than you are, like my buddy who bla bla bla bla bla....

People who minimize your feelings are not true friends. Real friends will listen and let you know they are there when you need them. They talk to you and ask what they can do to make you feel better. If you do have friends like that don't take advantage of their emotional generosity, appreciate them and let them know how much it means to you that they respect you and care for you. When the occasion arises, reciprocate.

People who always want to "One Up You" are people who are craving attention or some type of validation. I've seen men do it but not as often as women. I've noticed that women do it to women they really don't care for. If you want to really be a "Jerk" You can play a trick to catch them in the act. Make up a realistic story and spin it. Such as i test drove a Mercedes AX5050 yesterday and it was amazing. Their story will be probably that they test drove it the week before and they didn't like it and you can say to them "Dude i just made that car up". Or you can tell your story several times over the span of a few months and see if they change their story. But you know what? For me to do all this i first have to care about what these people are saying and i don't. When they start talking i turn a deaf ear and day dream.

My motto is " In a world where you can be anything, be yourself" I'm not lying, it's a sticker on my microwave and here's the photo to prove it :)

Any advice you can spare?

1 comment:

  1. I just like what you wrote in this blog and I find it very true, and like you said those people needs the whole attention and don't really care for what you're saying, they probably think what to answer whilst you're talking instead of listening and understanding and feeling what you're telling them, I say this kind of people you shouldn't go through serious conversation with them cause there is really no point. Be yourself and follow your heart,
    Love you.